Daily Archives: March 6, 2012

Petition Losers

Sorry for the delay between posts, but being on a work trip to the other side of the world really has hindered my ability to think about the things from back at UoM. Along with that I’ve been doing some pretty insane hours which has also been a pain.

If there’s one thing I learnt during my time at UoM, it’s how to deal with those annoying people asking for your signature on their petition for some cause which I have zero interest in.

These petition seekers generally target built up areas such as Union House, Monash Road, Wilson Hall as well as outside Bailleau Library.

Back in first year, I used to be a bit shy so I just got my phone out when I saw them from a distance  and either pretended to text or take a phone call, which worked usually, or i just politely said “No thanks”. But that’s how everyone deals with them and that’s no fun.

Then in second and third year, as my confidence grew, I begun trolling them with the most retarded things I could think of.

For example:

Petition Loser: “Would you like to sign this petition for gay marriage”

Me: “I haven’t signed”

Petition Loser: “Yes, you can sign here”

Me: “No, I have not physically signed”

Petition Loser: “You can sign here then!”


Petition loser will have a super baffled look by then.

There’s also a few others that I also use, such as using a FOB accent and purposely making no sense at all to test their patience. I’m amazed at how much tolerance most of these poor souls have. All that for a useless signature.

Sometimes, there’s some petition seekers that get fairly aggressive, these warrant a more direct troll. Generally attacking their cause then throwing in some personal insults get the job done quite well.