Daily Archives: February 13, 2016

Classic Post: Slut Tells


This is yet another classic post from the now closed LaidNYC blog.

Sluts make bad wives and mothers, but good short-term sex partners.
For you, noble cocksmith of the internet, I give this list of slut tells to help you screen girls out (for
relationships) or screen them in (for a quick dicking).
(in no particular order):
Celebrity worship
Wears Leopard print
Claims she was “abused” in the past
Has tattoos and piercings other than the ear lobe. Higher slut points the closer it is to an erogenous zone.
Fakeness (Bleached or dyed hair, boob job, fake nails, hair extensions, penciled on eyebrows)
Frequently travels to party destinations
Moves frequently
Fucks the first night you meet her (basically whatever date you fuck her on is what date guys usually fuck
her on)
She doesn’t live near her family
Claims she never wants kids
Has a gay bff/orbits several gay guys and/or loves gay culture in general
Dates younger men (no matter what her age or how small the age gap)
Has nude pictures of herself on her phone or computer
Single mother
She’s attractive, yet goes long lengths of time without a boyfriend
Wears hoop earrings
In pictures she tries to look sexy or sultry with closed lips instead of giving a warm, geniune smile
Has a messy bedroom
Wears bright red lipstick
Loves clubbing
Is really into the concert or electronic dance scene
Sorority girl
Early virginity loss (once girls start having sex, they don’t stop)
Can’t get along with girls
Has lots of “guy friends”
Child of divorce or unmarried parents
Posts “selfies” on social media
Has male hobbies (sports, gambling, etc.)
Drinks beer
Shows little concern for condom use
Drinks to excess often
Constantly has her iPhone glued to her hands
Is on multiple social media accounts that she updates
Is passionately liberal and feminist
Gives an especially skilled blowjob (as Andrew Dice Clay says…where do you think she learned that?)
Comes from a poor or lower class family
Has an unhealthy diet
Claims bisexuality
Hates to cook. Most of her meals come from eating out or ordering in.
Her friends are sluts
Uses drugs (the words “coke” and “whore” go together like peanut butter and jelly)
She did pageants
Is a bartender or (to a lesser extent) a waitress
This list is by no means comprehensive but it will serve you well on your path to avoid infidelity and
heartbreak, but also indulge in cost-free pussy without guilt.