Inside The University of Melbourne

Melbourne Pathways

I was catching up with a friend who was living in Hong Kong the past few years and London before that. We started talking about how it felt being back in Melbourne. The feeling of re-adapting to the place and so on. Here’s an excerpt of how the conversation went:

“Melbourne, it really comprises of the most materialistic minded people on earth. Dumb as a doorknob, completely degenerate, and used to a lifestyle which was just… a “lifestyle”. I heard someone calling it the “Seattle of the Southern Hemisphere” which is spot on. Leftism, atheistic materialistic “cafe” culture with loads of other faux-culture and at the same time riding a high-horse of an ill-perceived arrogance that’s based on nothing”

It was refreshing to speak to someone whose spent time in numerous cities and away from the Melbourne way of life.

As for me, after spending a number of years working and living abroad it is always intriguing to see how friends are doing back home.

Of course, everyone is a special snowflake and unique in their own way. But to simplify things, here are a few categories I have been able to place them into.

The careerist

A bunch of friends have fallen into this category. The head first into their career, constantly pushing themselves to new limits often at the expense of their health. However, part of me understands. You see, in a pretty boring city like Melbourne, there’s only a few ways to really keep yourself occupied, go hard at your hobbies, go hard with family, or go hard on your career. If you’re in Finance, and want to move up the chair, most people will have to sacrifice many long nights and weekends churning out work to impress others and get that edge to move up the corporate ladder.

Ultimately though, how much is too much?                                  

The difference of making $150k a year and $200k a year on a day to day basis probably isn’t noticeable to most. Money comes and goes, but time doesn’t after all.

The for lifer

Now these are the ones that ride the Melbourne train so hard. Boasting about the coffee and brunches as if no other city in the world compares. I nod and agree since it people in this category are usually so far gone that there’s not much point disagreeing. However in my head I think..

 ”Hmm.. go spend 3-5 years abroad in other more global cities in the world on a decent income and then come back to Melbourne”

But.. at this stage, its probably not the time in their life where they can afford to do that anymore since their so tied down to Melbourne.

Knocked up

I mean there’s nothing wrong with this category, but the young parents made the decision to have their kids young. So most of their time is spent on raising their kids. Understandable, I respect it.

Hoarders Haven

Some people, actually most people, they aren’t making solid income or working in a field where they need to long hours.

You know, the ones that weren’t exactly cut out for complex tasks. The ones that can just coast. Do a whatever job, that’s 9-5 and have a ton of spare time to watch TV and buy useless stuff. The ones that need to post the useless stuff they bought from Big W on their social media.

Yeah, those types. I was reading an article in the Newspaper last week where a woman mentioned what she is most looking forward to after lockdown ends, her response “Getting my Kmart fix!”

Does it get any more Melbourne than that?

There’s a lot of hoarders in Melbourne, and buying stuff gives them that dopamine hit and keeps them busy so it acts as both a time sink and a source of joy. Win-Win, right?