A girl either wants to bang you or she doesn’t. A long, emotional conversation will not change this fact.
Girls, however, need to put a man they are dumping into a desexualized box and wrap a pretty bow of closure around it. By participating in the closure process, you are helping her tie the bow around your desexualized fate.
If a girl breaks up with you: Do not talk about your feelings Do not talk about her feelings Do not argue with her reasons Just accept it and grieve on your own time.
This is hard.
Because a woman will never give her ACTUAL reasons for breaking up with you. She will only give you society-approved bullshit that makes her look innocent.
She will never say “you didn’t screw me good enough” or “you’re too nice and not exciting” or “no other girl I know wants to fuck you so something must be wrong with you”.
She will say “I’m really busy with school and work and don’t have time for a relationship now” or “you’re great but I’m not ready for anything serious” or “I care about you as a friend”.
Sometimes the reasons she gives will be SO false, such obvious flowery bullshit, that you will feel a deep burning need to set her straight, to correct her misunderstanding.
You can’t logic a woman.
You can say “Ok”, walk away with a smirk and never contact her again. Being robbed of emotionally dripping closure, she’ll always feel a little incomplete.
Why didn’t he fight harder for me? Did I really not get to his emotions? Am I not as desirable to him as I thought? Is he more desirable than I thought?
Girls have egos. They WANT to know you’re emotional about her breaking up with you. It validates her. So don’t do it. You want a girl dumping you to question her reasons, not verify them.
When a girl dumps you, you want to be able to look back on how your handled it with pride. When you give a girl closure, you give her your pride.
“You just like younger girls because they’re the only ones who fall for your dating tricks! You like them because they are easier to manipulate!”
Let’s cut right to the core:
Feminists say things like this because they hate young, beautiful girls and believe they are all stupid.
Let me tell you something: when it comes to relationship dynamics, girls are wily and smart as
fuck. They play most men like fiddles from age 12 onward. They think about relationships, talk constantly about relationships, and have many social interactions. Whether they want cock, money, attention, or commitment, they know how to get it.
Girls are not stupid, innocent victims.
They are predator, not prey.
Girls of every age are the manipulators far more often than they are the manipulated.
After age 24, women definitely do not get smarter about relationships. Their justifications do get stronger, though, out of necessity. (Besides, this premise is backwards. It is far easier to game older women into bed. They have less options and its likely been longer since they’ve had a good ol’ dicking.)
“You have nothing in common with a girl that young!”
I don’t have anything in common with the girls I’m attracted to, and I like it that way. It’s not a matter of age, it’s a matter of masculine and feminine.
I lift weights, she does yoga.
I order the steak; she orders the salad.
I watch Breaking Bad; she watches The Bachelorette.
I wear a suit; she wears a dress.
I don’t want a girl who sits on the couch watching football and scratching herself, because that’s my thing.
Having too much stuff in common sucks.
Wait, scratch that, I have a few things in common with the young girls I date: we both have high fertility and a deep passion for each other. Good enough for me.
“You date younger girls because you can’t get a girl your own age!”
Young girls being so in demand in the sexual market, any guy that can date one could easily pull an older one, he just doesn’t want to.
“No, really, an older woman would never put up with your shit!”
I won’t put up with her loose skin, baggage and jaded bitterness. Everybody wins!
“When you grow up in different times you have no common experiences to relate to!”
So, if I tell a girl the first CD I bought was Eminem – The Slim Shady LP and she says “Wow, me too! I was also born in 1989 and I also bought that CD in primary school with my chore money!” Is that a feminist’s idea of a good relationship? Conversations like that?
“You’re intimidated by a strong, independent woman!”
Replace “intimidated by” with “not attracted to”, and you have the truth.
When it comes to attracting a man, strength, independence and wisdom mean nothing. Youth, beauty and sweetness mean everything. Don’t Lean In.
“Younger girls are inexperienced, you should date someone older who knows what she wants!”
You see how most of the shaming tactics feminists use involve demeaning younger girls?
Young girls know what they want just fine.
Older women know what they want to: They want to be young again.
“Young girls are so immature!”
Age does not equal maturity.
Age can give a woman “maturity” not by virtue, but by NECESSITY:
When nobody is paying your way anymore, you have to work.
When nobody is giving you attention anymore, you stay out of clubs.
When the band won’t let you backstage anymore, you stop loving rock concerts.
Those who know what’s up will know that I wouldn’t not encourage guys to date immature sluts regardless of age.
Just because clubs are packed with sub-24-year-old skanks, that doesn’t mean all sub-24 year olds are club-going skanks.
There are girls who are both young and mature enough for a relationship. A girl who is not marriage material when she is young will never be marriage material.
“What does fertility matter if you’re not having kids with these younger girls?”
First of all, I do want kids.
Second of all, beauty is a proxy for fertility, and that’s what gets the dick hard.
This is really a retarded point so I don’t know why I’m responding to it. It’s like asking a girl
“why have sex if you’re on birth control?”
“You’re just having fun, when you start looking for something serious, you’ll get a girl your own age.”
When I am looking for “something serious”, aka long term commitment and kids, why the fuck would I choose a less fertile girl?
That is actually backwards. It makes far more sense for a younger guy to fuck cougars for a while
and then say “when I’m ready for kids I’ll choose a younger girl”. But I would never recommend such a strategy, because cougars are gross.
A friend of mine did the “girl his own age” thing, now they are 32 and want kids. She is having fertility problems, so they are paying thousands for the turkey baster technique and so far, it hasn’t worked. 32 years old. Think about that. That’s serious, alright: Seriously depressing.
“Women in their thirties are at their sexual peak!”
Women in their thirties do not have higher sex drives. They have more unfulfillled sex drives. There is a difference. A woman may feel hornier in her thirties because for the first time attractive men aren’t lining up to please her sexually
How’s this for perspective: People who are not given free access to all you can eat buffets are hungrier. If you believe in evolution, then you understand how absurd it would be for a women to be horniest at the time of her life when she is more apt to give birth to retarded children.
“What would you even talk about with a 20 year old?”
The same things I would talk about with a 30 year old, only my conversation partner would be hotter.
Seriously, I do not need to talk about the eighties and early 90’s in order to have a successful conversation.
Flirting and connecting is the same regardless of age.
“Older women are sexy!”
Haha. Good one!
“No, really, I am a woman and I am much better looking now than when I was 19 or 20!”
This can be true… if you are a recovering fattie. Did you recently lose a large amount of weight because you were tired of being caught in harpooner’s crosshairs?
“No, I was never fat, I just grew into my features and I’m much better looking at 27 than I was at 18!”
If you want to be taken seriously, provide comparison pictures. I’m not holding my breath.
“But Beyonce/ Salma Hayek/ Jennifer Aniston, etc is still hot!”
Take your favourite over 30 female celebrity that the media gushes about. There are at least 20 undergrads your local University that are hotter than her. Some men may deny this, but their boners wouldn’t if given a bedroom test. This is true despite the fact that those old female celebrities are hotter than 99 % of women their age. If there’s no hope for them, there’s certainly no hope for average women.
Bonus: The University girls wouldn’t need expert photoshopping and world-class makeup application to look hot.
“Younger girls have so much drama!”
There are single girls of any age who are drama-prone. I always recommend guys screen out the drama queens. People who say this have a narrow characterization of younger girls. Not all 21 year old girls are in nightclubs crying every weekend. Some of them like to do things like read and spend time with their families.
I’m not trying to convince anyone to pull the girl dancing on the bar into an LTR. Find the diamonds in the rough and say no to drama queens and attention whores.
However, that younger girls are more prone to drama is a testament to their hotness and options.
Or: older women wish they had that much drama.
“You date younger girls for your ego! You just want to brag about it because you’re insecure!”
Men date younger girls because they are hot.
I am against bragging about your sex life, but any sense of well-being a guy gets from dating a young, beautiful, fertile girl is evolutionarily justified.
“Guys who date younger girls are creepy!”
Creepiness is not an age. Some guys who TRY to date younger girls are indeed creepy. Guys who successfully bridge large age gaps are not.
No, it would be gross for a guy to be attracted to old women. Icky!
“So, you expect women to just go away and die when they get older? They have no value on earth?”
I am talking about sexual market value and attractiveness only.
That you think sex is the only measure of female value says more about you than it does about me.
I love my mother, aunts, cousins, etc. They have great value to me. Females are the care givers and supporters of family.
Want to still mean something to somebody when you’re 60? Have kids, and be a devoted wife and mother.
So, there you have it.
I hope this clears things up for the aging fertility-drained, expired cougars who failed to attract a good man, when they were young, and for the bitter snarky herb army who have been invisible to women under 25 for their entire lives. Find solace in each other during this difficult time.
I was catching up with a friend who was living in Hong Kong the past few years and London before that. We started talking about how it felt being back in Melbourne. The feeling of re-adapting to the place and so on. Here’s an excerpt of how the conversation went:
“Melbourne, it really comprises of the most materialistic minded people on earth. Dumb as a doorknob, completely degenerate, and used to a lifestyle which was just… a “lifestyle”. I heard someone calling it the “Seattle of the Southern Hemisphere” which is spot on. Leftism, atheistic materialistic “cafe” culture with loads of other faux-culture and at the same time riding a high-horse of an ill-perceived arrogance that’s based on nothing”
It was refreshing to speak to someone whose spent time in numerous cities and away from the Melbourne way of life.
As for me, after spending a number of years working and living abroad it is always intriguing to see how friends are doing back home.
Of course, everyone is a special snowflake and unique in their own way. But to simplify things, here are a few categories I have been able to place them into.
A bunch of friends have fallen into this category. The head first into their career, constantly pushing themselves to new limits often at the expense of their health. However, part of me understands. You see, in a pretty boring city like Melbourne, there’s only a few ways to really keep yourself occupied, go hard at your hobbies, go hard with family, or go hard on your career. If you’re in Finance, and want to move up the chair, most people will have to sacrifice many long nights and weekends churning out work to impress others and get that edge to move up the corporate ladder.
Ultimately though, how much is too much?
The difference of making $150k a year and $200k a year on a day to day basis probably isn’t noticeable to most. Money comes and goes, but time doesn’t after all.
The for lifer
Now these are the ones that ride the Melbourne train so hard. Boasting about the coffee and brunches as if no other city in the world compares. I nod and agree since it people in this category are usually so far gone that there’s not much point disagreeing. However in my head I think..
”Hmm.. go spend 3-5 years abroad in other more global cities in the world on a decent income and then come back to Melbourne”
But.. at this stage, its probably not the time in their life where they can afford to do that anymore since their so tied down to Melbourne.
I mean there’s nothing wrong with this category, but the young parents made the decision to have their kids young. So most of their time is spent on raising their kids. Understandable, I respect it.
Some people, actually most people, they aren’t making solid income or working in a field where they need to long hours.
You know, the ones that weren’t exactly cut out for complex tasks. The ones that can just coast. Do a whatever job, that’s 9-5 and have a ton of spare time to watch TV and buy useless stuff. The ones that need to post the useless stuff they bought from Big W on their social media.
Yeah, those types. I was reading an article in the Newspaper last week where a woman mentioned what she is most looking forward to after lockdown ends, her response “Getting my Kmart fix!”
Does it get any more Melbourne than that?
There’s a lot of hoarders in Melbourne, and buying stuff gives them that dopamine hit and keeps them busy so it acts as both a time sink and a source of joy. Win-Win, right?
Hey I can only stay for a minute. (He talks to her the rest of the night)
“…that is why things would never work out between us” (Then he takes her phone number)
“We should stop” “Yeah, we should” (he keeps going)
You can come in but only for a minute (She sleeps over)
Hands off, this shit ain’t free (He touches her 30 seconds later)
It is like a hack or a cheat code to seduction: You can physically and logistically escalate as long as you verbally deny it. Its to the point where I’m convinced you really could do one thing whilst saying you’re doing another and both parties are fine with it. Some whatt like discovering a flaw in a video game that lets you beat it every time.
If I could sum up the concept it is this: be the resistor (verbally), be the escalator (physically). Fundamentally speaking, this works because the one who wants the other less is in power. So being the resistor is a power play.
The catch? Girls know this and do it, and they do it better than men.
Do you always talk to girls on the street?
Nothing’s going to happen, I’m a good girl.
We’re not going to have sex tonight.
Most guys don’t get that girls are grabbing the power with these statements so they switch into chase mode like a pussy-begging dullard, leaking more and more control over the interaction until the girl’s legs snap violently shut like a bear trap.
Don’t do that.
Instead, you retake the control. Re-establish yourself as the resistor. When she steps back, you step back a little further. Every time she sets a boundary, you reset one in a different place. Every time she draws a line in the sand, you redraw one on your terms.
Her: I don’t kiss on the first date
You: Good, I don’t kiss before marriage
Her: We’re not having sex tonight
You: Relax, are you always thinking about sex?
Her: Let’s just be friends.
You: Nah I don’t see you as a friend. We shouldn’t hang out anymore.
Was going through some emails this week and came across this one, from a herb from over in Perth, I had to hold back from laughing.
You fucking degenerate cunt, people like you make our gender as a whole a fucking joke. You state these bottom feeders views with no proof or evidence or real world situations which made you feel this way. You create this breeding ground for toxic masculinity that just doesn’t need to exist in this day and age. Your choice of words and phrases make you out like a troubled 15 year old who has been denied by the LoVE oF hIS lIfE. With your reasoning chicks shouldn’t try amount to anything instead just be submissive. You know they’re human beings right legit no fucking different to us. Also you have one fucking post relating to uni melb which is hilarious in its self
When an enraged male starts sprouting the word “Toxic Masculinity” you already know all hope within “him” is lost.
Lauren is happy. Last night, her boyfriend Mark finally told her he loved her. She had been wanting that
ever since they started seeing each other four months ago. She had been having sex with him, and it had
been pleasurable for sure, but she was doing so hoping it would turn into something more: love.
Mark had been aloof and slow to give away his emotions. Lauren didn’t mind this, she even preferred it. It meant that she had to work for his love, and by the time he said it, she felt she had earned it
and that it really meant something to him.
Lauren set up an excited brunch with her friends Stina, Terri and Lisa. They hadn’t seen each other in four months, in fact none of them knew she was dating Mark. Right away, she starts telling them
the good news.
“Wow” said Stina, “I didn’t even know you were dating a new guy! That’s great.”
“Yeah”, said Terri, “what is the guy’s name?”
“Mark Smith”, said Lauren. A hush immediately fell over her support group as they began to give
each other awkward looks.
“Uhhhh, Lauren”, said Lisa, “Mark Smith has loved a lot of girls.”
“Yeah”, said Stina, “He told Jackie Valenti he loved her.”
“Okay” said Lauren, “But she probably fucked his brains out, right? Like, he was definitely getting
sex from her?”
Stina cringes. “No” she says, “They never even kissed. He went over to her place drunk one night
and professed his love for her. She never even let him in her bedroom.”
“Alright but that’s only one girl. That’s okay.” Said Lauren, getting nervous.
“Well there’s also Andrea Tedesco. He told her he loved her after two casual dates.” said Terri,
“She was bragging that she kept him around for a while, getting ‘good morning beautiful’ texts from him and other indications of love whenever she needed it, and she only stopped accepting his love when he started to want sex. He still writes on her facebook wall.”
Lauren felt a deep pit in her stomach.
Lisa continues: “Mark told Angelica Messina he loved her the first night he met her. She said he was REALLY into it, looking her right in the eyes when he said it, getting down on his knees in front of her
just to kiss her hand, and he even recited poetry for her. She gave him one of those awkward one arm hugs and that was it.”
He never did that freaky stuff with me, thought Lauren. If he does that stuff, then why did I just
get a plain old “I love you”?
Plus Angelica is the biggest cock tease in the city, thought Lauren. How could Mark fall for her
bullshit? What an idiot. Now she thought Mark was stupid as well as loose with his love.
Stina says, apologetically, “I don’t want to tell you this, but I heard Mark met a girl in a club and
dragged her into the bathroom to tell her she was beautiful, then he gave her twenty dollars. She never even touched him.”
“Okay, please stop” said Lauren. She was growing sicker by the second, her world crushed.
Later, she confronts Mark with her new knowledge. Did he really love all those girls without get-
ting sex from them? She demands to know.
“Well yeah but I didn’t really WANT sex from them”, Mark lies, possibly even to himself, “I wanted to give
them love, that’s all. I wasn’t ready for sex at that point in my life.”
“Uggggghhhhh” says Lauren, “Don’t you know that guys who give girls love and attention without
getting sex are LOSERS??? The girls getting the love and attention don’t actually respect them, they are
just using them!”
“No way, guys can want love without sex, too”, claims Mark.
“Well I heard you told Shirley Thompson from my building you loved her and I have to look at her
every day. Plus she’s really pretty, there’s no way she was going to fuck you! Why did you love her?” says
“Is that what this is about”, Mark says, “You are just insecure because I have more experience
with love than you. You think you can’t measure up to all the beautiful girls I’ve loved in the past.”
“Just how many girls did you tell you loved?” asks Lauren
“I don’t know, about 30” says Mark
This hits Lauren like a brick in the stomach. “30! That is insane, you are a loser!”
“Can’t you see that my past doesn’t matter, and you are giving me sex now and that’s all that
matters?” says Mark, “I love the sex we have and that’s something I didn’t get from the other girls.”
Mark can’t see why this only makes Lauren madder. Why should she be the one who has to pay by putting her valuable eggs at risk by taking his sperm in order to get the love and attention that the other
girls got so easily.
“Well if you give away love so easily, why did you make me wait?” says Lauren, “Was I not as good
as the other girls?”
“Well I saw the chance for sex with you and I didn’t want to mess that up by giving away love too
soon”, says Mark.
Lauren dumped Mark.
She had to.
Someone so loose with their emotions is not a good person to give sex to.
What if they have a son who turns out to be easily manipulated by a pretty face, like Mark?
What if a pretty girl in need bats her eyelashes at him and he gives her money that their family
What if she just wants a man’s love all to herself and that can’t happen with Mark?
Even beyond that, on a very visceral, base level that she couldn’t explain, she found Mark repulsive. It was as if she had been wired biologically to feel disgust and lack of attraction for guys who allow
themselves to get friend zoned. There was no way she could fuck him again.
Yup, it was as clear as day, thought Lauren. Guys who give away love easily are definitely not
worthy of sex.
A classic post from LaidNYC from all the way back in 2013, and I definitely stand by the principle of it today.
Australia, more specifically the city of Melbourne is potentially up there with heavily Cuckolded regions such as Scandinavia, US and Canada.
Recently, a thread posted in forum disclosed great areas to meet women, at most it’s locker room banter amongst men discussing their thoughts and outcomes at potentially meeting suitable women for dating. This is a normal phenomenon amongst humans.
Now the leftoid media in Melbourne has somehow linked (go figure how?!) asking a girl out to a string of violent murders that have taken place in Melbourne over the last year or so.
And the cuckfuck media gobbles it up to shit out these above articles.
And given how cuckolded universities are, they side with the freakshows:
It’s always the undesirable leftovers that complain the hardest about “rape culture” and “Creepy men” perhaps it’s their justification of never getting any male attention. It’s just like how Children sabotage their friends when they are enraged, “If I don’t get any attention, nobody does!”
Fuck that shit.
It’s also convenient how the African immigrants causing crimes targeting international students are totally forgotten:
Youth gangs target international students at an elite Melbourne university as they’re robbed and bashed in sickening string of attacks
– A number of international students are being mugged around Monash University
– In the last 18 days police have been notified of 13 separate attacks on people
– Some people are even assaulted after they hand over their belongings to thugs
– Police in Melbourne are chasing a number of suspects of African appearance
A growing number of international students at an elite Melbourne university are being violently robbed.
Chinese students at Monash University are falling victim to gang violence in the suburban suburb of Clayton – having their wallets, phones and credit cards stolen.
In the last 18 days police have been notified of 13 separate attacks on people as young as 19 to as old as 55, the Herald Sun reported.
Kuan Gao, a 19-year-old Chinese student, had his iPhone and wallet stolen from him by three African men at night when he was walking near the university on April 18.
‘They said very urgently “give us your wallet.” In the meantime, one guy asked me to reset my iPhone settings. I knew they were going to rob me,’ Mr Gao said.
He said he wasn’t able to run away because they blocked him, and the road was too long.
The mugging problem in the area is so bad that there’s even posters telling people to beware of thugs.
‘Warning: Take care when walking through laneway. There have been several incidents of assault and burglaries,’ the sign reads.
Mr Gao said he is now forced to take Ubers home at night, as he needs to walk down the dangerous alleyway to get home.
Another student was mugged at knifepoint near the campus a month earlier, where his attackers even stole the jacket and shirt from his back after taking his brand new iPhone XR.
Some of the victims were subjected to assaults even after giving up their valuables.
Our cuckfuck overloads continue to push the #diversityisstrength notion whilst forgetting the downside risk in letting the lowest rung of migrants pollute the population. Instead, the war on men continues as a substitute to attack whenever possible.
Extreme-leftist Social Justice Warriors (SJWs) continue to plague universities and indoctrinating their students with their flawed ideologies. It’s sad they have become so fragile that anything, literally anything that goes against their beliefs must be taken down or attacked.
Every week I get emails from men that give me examples of ridiculous SJWs, here’s one from a month or so ago:
I’m an Eastern Europe expat from Australia. I did my university studies in Melbourne as well as Sydney.
Were you aware of the fiasco at Sydney Uni last week with Bettina Arndt’s talk?
Now, I know you write a blog pertaining to the University of Melbourne, but the same hysteria affecting the mentally ill protesters at Sydney Uni affects a large contingent of the indoctrinated students, past and present, at/from your alma mater, too.
It would be great if your blog could cover this, as I know there was a similar incident at La Trobe of late.
I’m surprised we haven’t heard as much about Bettina Arndt from angry Melbourne Uni SJWs.
It’s sad that this myth of “rape crisis” cannot be discussed openly at all, SJWs will censor, ban or forcefully attack anyone that goes against their belief system.
If you live in a place where your freedom is being taken away, and you’re being institutionally oppressed, that’s a society you should leave behind.
Universities have long been known to be feminist propaganda training grounds, which condition the next generation to adhere to the the dystopian views of Feminism
Feminism gives women a “Get out of jail-free” card where they are able to commit heinous acts such as falsely accuse men of rape and ruin their careers and livelihoods without any remorse, regret or consequences.
A Study showed that 41% of rape allegations are fake, women have been told now that any sexual interaction where they feel regret or uncomfortable, AFTER the act took place is now considered “rape”. A woman can Single-handedly destroy the life of a man just because she felt cheap after opening her legs to him with consent the night before.
The push for Feminists and SJWs to basically make women untouchable in terms of the law continues to abide by the loose definition put out by Heartiste back in 2013
The goal of feminism is to remove all constraints on female sexuality while maximally restricting male sexuality.
Now it extends beyond just sexuality, men are now almost institutionally oppressed with an eventual view of becoming merely tax payers and sperm donors.
This is not just in law, we see famous sports people now pull out the “Sexism” card like Serena Williams recently did.
Calling a tennis umpire a “liar” and “thief” isn’t going to help your cause, but in her view, because she’s a strong (literally), black, and empowered woman, she can totally disregard her violations and bring up “Sexism”as a means to totally distract her disrespectful behaviour and destroy her 20 year old opponents’ moment in the spotlight after winning her first grand slam.
Instead, she’ll be touted as a hero by SJW controlled media and feminists, and her poor behaviour will probably be overlooked which is unacceptable considering the history of poor on-count behaviour she has demonstrated over the course of her career.
It’s sad to see the Western World of today crumble so badly with causes that destroy traditional values, and attack the family unit. Inter-gender relations will worsen and more and more men will drop out of the mating market in total.
Have you ever wondered what attention whoring looks like?
If you were raped or sexually assaulted by a man, you would report it to the cops, be traumatised by it and probably not be staying Facebook friends with your perpetrator, right?
You wouldn’t tag them on Facebook updates, right?
Well lets see here..
Exhibit A: Sub-par Asian girl who is considered bottom quartile in every city in Asia.
Feminist Views – Check
Pink Hair – Check
Attention Whore – Check
Average/Below Average Looks – Check
Tatted Up – Check
Beta Herb involved is using Feminism/Liberalism as a means to get laid – Check
Today I am choosing to use my voice to talk about an evil that is so taboo and deranging that we, as a society, give it the power and strength to poison our world. This evil is known by the name of rape.
Rape is such an uncomfortable and scary subject that people find it easier not to address or confront it, thus enabling it to fester and grow and survive in the shadows. By not openly talking about a matter as serious as rape, we give it more power. We, as a society, seem so uncomfortable discussing rape that we often blame the victims of assault rather than dealing with the issue as a whole, its roots and its perpetrators.
On the other hand, shining a light on this issue and addressing it directly can be an effective way to lessen its impact, spread awareness and help create the world we want to live in. Our voices can become weapons of dissuasion on tools of empowerment.
Of course, it is for the victims of assault to choose for themselves whether to speak out or not, according to what they think is better for them… but the ones who speak up shouldn’t be the ones left to live in shame, guilt, and fear. The perpetrators and the ones who protect them are the ones that should be carrying this burden.
Our common preconception of rape is biased. We often picture a man, lurking in a dark alleyway waiting for his prey to come. More often than not the perpetrators are someone the victim trusts. The gap between preconception and reality can be so great that it introduces doubts into our minds when we consider specific situations, especially involving people we know.
In my case, the man who assaulted me is <Name Redacted>. He is a respected artist in the community, someone who makes things happen, someone who empowers the people he sees potential in. He is a supporter of the #MeToo movement and of feminism in general. I mention this because even people who represent themselves as allies are capable of this evil. It is good we are having more conversations about rape and consent but obviously there is still much to do.
Now, you might be wondering why I Choose to say his name. I would like to make it clear that my goal here is to encourage conversation, not to trigger a witch hunt, campaign of hate, or any sort of violent reprisal. My intention is simply to encourage a conversation about this issue. Let’s speak more openly about this painful and difficult matter on all levels: in a private or public sphere, with your partner, with your friends, with your students etc. We all have the power to change society and make it a better place for everyone.
Yet calling a girl out on this would never work, they simply can’t accept being wrong or at blame.
The weirdest part is, the tagged perpetrator, is the first to comment and they are still on speaking terms it seems.
However, I’m rather glad someone called her out on this:
This girl here, instead of reporting her assault to the authorities, writes a huge Facebook post about it, tags the beta that “assaulted” her, then stays Facebook friends with him. How much of an assault was it really? Girls will easily ruin a mans career and future by misusing these tools against rape, yet nobody will hold them accountable for their actions, as society will always treat them as the victim and cradle them as children.
Honestly, this is becoming a joke. It’s about fitting in, “Oh you got an iPhone X? And you got assaulted? Girl, me too! #metoo!”