You could be the spitting image of your father, and grandfathers. Similar build, same eyes, same cheekbones. Inheriting several of his hobbies and dispositions could also come with the pass downs.
Your great grandfather and grandfather could also be dead and dead for a long while you could never know them
It is by sheer chance that those genes influenced you more than anyone else in your lineage, but here you are. Here he is. You are him. His conscious mind is dead. He is not.
Be proud of your genetics. They are not perfect, but you have several enviable qualities. It’s because of these qualities that centuries ago, men with your genes fought for resources, status and women and were successful. Today, using their genes, you are becoming successful as well.
See, don’t think having kids is the ultimate measure of a man. It is the consequence of, not the driver of hedonistic desire. Men haven’t evolved baby rabies like women. However, some of us have healthy K-selected instincts to want to have and provide for our own spawn. There is something natural about it. It is due to these instincts that many would surely feel regret if they never became a father.
You see, too often this debate is black and white. There are sworn bachelors claiming anyone who marries and has kids is an idiot, and there are righteous family men claiming anyone who doesn’t pass his genes on isn’t a true man. People make their choice, then to make peace with their choice, they claim that it wasn’t a choice at all and anyone who claims otherwise is stupid.
Truth is, both sides are right and wrong.
I can’t argue with a guy who chooses to run free in an easy-sex society rather than settle down in the burdensome responsibility of providing for a wife and kids with a legal system stacked against him.
I can’t argue with a guy who wants to build a legacy and pass his accumulated knowledge and wealth to a genetic lineage of his own flesh and blood.
The men who crusade against having kids make great points. They are right, it is a huge risk and sacrifice. For many men, it is probably not a good choice. However, to those of us with K-selected instincts, NOT having kids would also be a sacrifice.
Life always contains trade-offs, evaluate your desires accordingly
There’s often talk of hypergamy for women, marrying a higher status male to elevate herself in the sexual marketplace, but what about for men?
I recently was thinking about this. There’s the common saying of a man “Batting above his average” when he is with a girl that is often more beautiful than he is handsome, but everyone whose reading this would know that a man’s sexual market value (SMV) is generally derived more from factors besides looks. His social status, wealth, demeanour and confidence all play a part, and a man scoring highly on those areas will not have much of a problem nabbing a worthy girl.
However, there’s also another lens which gets overlooked rather often these days. The value of a girl with innocence who hasn’t been cock carouselled like the vast majority. Being chaste isn’t rewarded as a man, but is as a woman. Any player can bang and commit to a carousel rider that’s ridden an array of dudes after hitting puberty but girls who actually value their hymen are few and far between and less likely to spread for a guy with a massive notch count.
It would be rare seeing a guy with a solid triple digit notch count with a virgin, or a low notch girl, but if that is a metric which means something to the player and that goal is achieved a part of me sees that as almost hypergamous for the male. As documented, there are numerous benefits of having a low or no notch partner, and in a world where everyone fucks everyone, a hint of innocence is refreshing.
The references to past experiences, the emotional damage from exes, the uncontrollable comparisons to guys from the past – these are all things that women often do without realising and make it harder for them to bond to a man after they’ve had their fill of “fun” so to speak. So it makes total sense for a guy to want someone whose not going to have a large spectrum of experiences. “My ex” this and “My ex” that conversations should come up briefly in the beginning once you get to know one another but having those as a constant feature throughout a relationship is simply toxic and avoiding the risk of that is always going to be more desirable.
I’ve always held firm that “Men lie, women lie, notches don’t” when it comes to desirability in the sexual marketplace and I truly can’t believe if a girl is perpetually used by dozens of guys that she’ll have a personality, warmth or femininity left in her to be as desirable as she once was. Setting that hard boundary on what you can accept as a man is a trait most guys these days don’t have anymore, either through constant societal pressures or thirst.
I was doing some cleaning the other day and throwing away old clothes that I haven’t worn in years. I realised how much more stuff I had bought whilst living in Australia compared to other places.
It could potentially be seen as me having more space to store them or a more “permanent” home there. But also, I realised a lot of this was to kill time, given there’s generally not much going on on weekdays in Melbourne, especially after the years of lockdown, the tendency would be to buy stuff online. Compared to living in Asia and Europe where people would often be out after work and have the option to actually be out and do things, you simply don’t have the time to be couped up in your room watching Netflix after dinner most week nights, since there are other options to spend your time.
On top of that, there’s this culture that exists in Australia, similar to the US, of just constantly buying the latest and greatest to fill out space. Latest gadgets? Check. Latest furniture? Check. A new Weber Barbeque? Check. A new road bike with a custom seat? You bet. I’m sure most people who have worked a Corporate gig in Australia realise that the water cooler banter revolves heavily around purchases and boasting about the latest one.
A “Bunnings run” and a “Kmart run” is now rivaling similar levels of popularity to the famous “Maccas run”.
Yet despite living in a culture of constant consumerism and material purchases, the environment and sustainability are key political topics for most Australians as we saw in the recent elections. I hope we see a change in trends and behaviour rather than be riddled with hypocrisy. But in all honesty, I’d expect nothing less in Melbourne.
Below is a classic post from a blog that is no longer functional, LaidNYC. This post is from over 7 years ago.
Once upon a time, the harsh winter of northern latitudes brought forth a great selective pressure upon its human inhabitants. The challenges of the terrain selected for the clever, and the cold climate allowed brains to expand with little metabolic cost. The minds it shaped brought forth innovation, first benefitting themselves and their spawn. Then capital, markets, and money coevolved with agriculture and eventually developed into an Industrial Revolution to solve problems for the masses at a low price of $19.95. Now western humanity has all the comfort and prosperity that 99.9% of humans did not have throughout history, with none of the brainpower required.
Today the threats of predators, vicious weather, starvation, and sexual excess have been solved by innovations built by great minds: Temperature controlled housing, superior technology, and weaponry, mass-produced food, medical innovation. It is only with these prosperous luxuries that this generation can consider progressive arguments that would get themselves laughed out of their village in shame throughout civilized history. Indeed, being a progressive has become a way to signal just how comfortable and high status you are. Thank you for the innovations in reproductive medicine, now stay out of my bedroom while I laugh at the religious ethics that was my ancestor’s penicillin. Open your borders, disarm and share everything with the world or you’re a backward racist hick. This washing machine is great, now stop oppressing women like a caveman.
With these comforts, for the first time, the selective pressures that will shape the genome of future generations are not coming from nature, it is coming from high verbal IQ shysters within the populace. But Darwin doesn’t care. Threats to reproductive fitness can come from a bear running at you, or from a TV telling your daughter to never settle. You see the unfortunate story of a woman who spent the currency of her youth on degrees and contracepted sex with alpha males and then her IVF doesn’t take at 35. What I see is a gazelle that got eaten by a cheetah because it couldn’t run fast enough. To the universe, the result is just the same. There are those who won’t reproduce by their own carelessness or choice. It isn’t to be fought. It is an evolution in action. It isn’t sad, it is a beautiful thing to witness.
Those who are most susceptible to believe the slick liars when they preach equalism and egalitarianism and pathological altruism will see their reproductive fitness decline. Teach your daughter to be a strong independent feminist and you’ll take your death rattle with no grandchildren at the side of your bed. Embrace the blank slate and don’t say anything racist in front of your children, and your grandkids end up looking nothing like you. Refuse to extend a middle finger at the warm n’ fuzzy everyone-gets-a-trophy philosophy and your son ends up a pussy. But with evolution, there are winners as well as losers. Some will resist these pressures. Indeed, the cultural Marxists should be careful what they wish for: They’re selecting for the smartest, most fertile, most racist, most patriarchal group the world has seen.
Of course, the high-time preference underclass who can’t summon the willpower to reach for a condom in the heat of the moment will continue to spawn above the carrying capacity of their earning power. But an Idiocracy can only be supported by the grace and altruism of wealth-producing hosts. The civilized world that they thieve trust from is held together with precarious threads, not least of all being a novel fiat reserve currency. A black swan event will not be kind. When the greenback goes full Madoff and/or technological advances finally crush all the monkey-sorting-widget jobs and the parasite class must be formalized with a Guaranteed Minimum Income, you will see the flight on a massive scale. Secession, expatriation, high walls, immigration-by-genome, and no apologies.
So keep up the “progress”. Release those cheetahs and we’ll see which gazelle can run the fastest. You think each time a universal ballot or activist judge swings left you’ve won a battle when really you’re just creating more legroom for my grandkids in Elysium.
First, take out a sheet of paper and write 100 times:
My flaws are never clearer to a man than after the first time he has sex with me. My flaws are never clearer to a man than after the first time he has sex with me. My flaws are never clearer to a man than after the first time he has sex with me.
Men don’t want it to be this way. A guy doesn’t choose to be less attracted to a girl. That doesn’t matter.
See, before sex a man thinks with his dick.
He is thinking of all your positive qualities and why he wants to fuck you.
He is conquest driven.
He doesn’t consciously acknowledge or think of your flaws.
After that first sweet sexual release, a man is forced to use his brain to evaluate you for the first time. Without a hard dick in his way, a man can more easily see a girl’s flaws.
Understanding this one thing about men’s sex drives could save women a ton of heart break: You are always more beautiful and interesting BEFORE we have sex with you.
Girls, your silver lining? Well, the dick has a short attention span. The longer a guy has to wait to have sex with you, the more he is forced to evaluate you using his brain and not his dick.
Guys who would ditch you after that first sex will ditch you just the same if forced to wait long enough. Successful, efficient players even admit to this as a strategy. It’s the three-date rule.
This is tough for women to truly grasp, since that first sex is likely to make them more attracted to the man. Then there’s a lot of waiting by the phone, jumping at every text message and being disappointed when its from your sister. It doesn’t have to be that way.
Of course, girls won’t really take this advice because its the attractive guys who won’t wait, but I’m putting it out there anyway.
HOWEVER, once a guy has seen a girl’s beauty fade over post-coital glow a few too many times, he learns two things
Raise your standards. There is less post-sex attraction drop with hotter girls.
Enjoy, don’t just tolerate, the time you spend with a woman before the first time you guys do it. Its the most you will ever desire her and its the most interesting she’ll ever be to you. Cherish it.
“You just like younger girls because they’re the only ones who fall for your dating tricks! You like them because they are easier to manipulate!”
Let’s cut right to the core:
Feminists say things like this because they hate young, beautiful girls and believe they are all stupid.
Let me tell you something: when it comes to relationship dynamics, girls are wily and smart as
fuck. They play most men like fiddles from age 12 onward. They think about relationships, talk constantly about relationships, and have many social interactions. Whether they want cock, money, attention, or commitment, they know how to get it.
Girls are not stupid, innocent victims.
They are predator, not prey.
Girls of every age are the manipulators far more often than they are the manipulated.
After age 24, women definitely do not get smarter about relationships. Their justifications do get stronger, though, out of necessity. (Besides, this premise is backwards. It is far easier to game older women into bed. They have less options and its likely been longer since they’ve had a good ol’ dicking.)
“You have nothing in common with a girl that young!”
I don’t have anything in common with the girls I’m attracted to, and I like it that way. It’s not a matter of age, it’s a matter of masculine and feminine.
I lift weights, she does yoga.
I order the steak; she orders the salad.
I watch Breaking Bad; she watches The Bachelorette.
I wear a suit; she wears a dress.
I don’t want a girl who sits on the couch watching football and scratching herself, because that’s my thing.
Having too much stuff in common sucks.
Wait, scratch that, I have a few things in common with the young girls I date: we both have high fertility and a deep passion for each other. Good enough for me.
“You date younger girls because you can’t get a girl your own age!”
Young girls being so in demand in the sexual market, any guy that can date one could easily pull an older one, he just doesn’t want to.
“No, really, an older woman would never put up with your shit!”
I won’t put up with her loose skin, baggage and jaded bitterness. Everybody wins!
“When you grow up in different times you have no common experiences to relate to!”
So, if I tell a girl the first CD I bought was Eminem – The Slim Shady LP and she says “Wow, me too! I was also born in 1989 and I also bought that CD in primary school with my chore money!” Is that a feminist’s idea of a good relationship? Conversations like that?
“You’re intimidated by a strong, independent woman!”
Replace “intimidated by” with “not attracted to”, and you have the truth.
When it comes to attracting a man, strength, independence and wisdom mean nothing. Youth, beauty and sweetness mean everything. Don’t Lean In.
“Younger girls are inexperienced, you should date someone older who knows what she wants!”
You see how most of the shaming tactics feminists use involve demeaning younger girls?
Young girls know what they want just fine.
Older women know what they want to: They want to be young again.
“Young girls are so immature!”
Age does not equal maturity.
Age can give a woman “maturity” not by virtue, but by NECESSITY:
When nobody is paying your way anymore, you have to work.
When nobody is giving you attention anymore, you stay out of clubs.
When the band won’t let you backstage anymore, you stop loving rock concerts.
Those who know what’s up will know that I wouldn’t not encourage guys to date immature sluts regardless of age.
Just because clubs are packed with sub-24-year-old skanks, that doesn’t mean all sub-24 year olds are club-going skanks.
There are girls who are both young and mature enough for a relationship. A girl who is not marriage material when she is young will never be marriage material.
“What does fertility matter if you’re not having kids with these younger girls?”
First of all, I do want kids.
Second of all, beauty is a proxy for fertility, and that’s what gets the dick hard.
This is really a retarded point so I don’t know why I’m responding to it. It’s like asking a girl
“why have sex if you’re on birth control?”
“You’re just having fun, when you start looking for something serious, you’ll get a girl your own age.”
When I am looking for “something serious”, aka long term commitment and kids, why the fuck would I choose a less fertile girl?
That is actually backwards. It makes far more sense for a younger guy to fuck cougars for a while
and then say “when I’m ready for kids I’ll choose a younger girl”. But I would never recommend such a strategy, because cougars are gross.
A friend of mine did the “girl his own age” thing, now they are 32 and want kids. She is having fertility problems, so they are paying thousands for the turkey baster technique and so far, it hasn’t worked. 32 years old. Think about that. That’s serious, alright: Seriously depressing.
“Women in their thirties are at their sexual peak!”
Women in their thirties do not have higher sex drives. They have more unfulfillled sex drives. There is a difference. A woman may feel hornier in her thirties because for the first time attractive men aren’t lining up to please her sexually
How’s this for perspective: People who are not given free access to all you can eat buffets are hungrier. If you believe in evolution, then you understand how absurd it would be for a women to be horniest at the time of her life when she is more apt to give birth to retarded children.
“What would you even talk about with a 20 year old?”
The same things I would talk about with a 30 year old, only my conversation partner would be hotter.
Seriously, I do not need to talk about the eighties and early 90’s in order to have a successful conversation.
Flirting and connecting is the same regardless of age.
“Older women are sexy!”
Haha. Good one!
“No, really, I am a woman and I am much better looking now than when I was 19 or 20!”
This can be true… if you are a recovering fattie. Did you recently lose a large amount of weight because you were tired of being caught in harpooner’s crosshairs?
“No, I was never fat, I just grew into my features and I’m much better looking at 27 than I was at 18!”
If you want to be taken seriously, provide comparison pictures. I’m not holding my breath.
“But Beyonce/ Salma Hayek/ Jennifer Aniston, etc is still hot!”
Take your favourite over 30 female celebrity that the media gushes about. There are at least 20 undergrads your local University that are hotter than her. Some men may deny this, but their boners wouldn’t if given a bedroom test. This is true despite the fact that those old female celebrities are hotter than 99 % of women their age. If there’s no hope for them, there’s certainly no hope for average women.
Bonus: The University girls wouldn’t need expert photoshopping and world-class makeup application to look hot.
“Younger girls have so much drama!”
There are single girls of any age who are drama-prone. I always recommend guys screen out the drama queens. People who say this have a narrow characterization of younger girls. Not all 21 year old girls are in nightclubs crying every weekend. Some of them like to do things like read and spend time with their families.
I’m not trying to convince anyone to pull the girl dancing on the bar into an LTR. Find the diamonds in the rough and say no to drama queens and attention whores.
However, that younger girls are more prone to drama is a testament to their hotness and options.
Or: older women wish they had that much drama.
“You date younger girls for your ego! You just want to brag about it because you’re insecure!”
Men date younger girls because they are hot.
I am against bragging about your sex life, but any sense of well-being a guy gets from dating a young, beautiful, fertile girl is evolutionarily justified.
“Guys who date younger girls are creepy!”
Creepiness is not an age. Some guys who TRY to date younger girls are indeed creepy. Guys who successfully bridge large age gaps are not.
No, it would be gross for a guy to be attracted to old women. Icky!
“So, you expect women to just go away and die when they get older? They have no value on earth?”
I am talking about sexual market value and attractiveness only.
That you think sex is the only measure of female value says more about you than it does about me.
I love my mother, aunts, cousins, etc. They have great value to me. Females are the care givers and supporters of family.
Want to still mean something to somebody when you’re 60? Have kids, and be a devoted wife and mother.
So, there you have it.
I hope this clears things up for the aging fertility-drained, expired cougars who failed to attract a good man, when they were young, and for the bitter snarky herb army who have been invisible to women under 25 for their entire lives. Find solace in each other during this difficult time.
I was catching up with a friend who was living in Hong Kong the past few years and London before that. We started talking about how it felt being back in Melbourne. The feeling of re-adapting to the place and so on. Here’s an excerpt of how the conversation went:
“Melbourne, it really comprises of the most materialistic minded people on earth. Dumb as a doorknob, completely degenerate, and used to a lifestyle which was just… a “lifestyle”. I heard someone calling it the “Seattle of the Southern Hemisphere” which is spot on. Leftism, atheistic materialistic “cafe” culture with loads of other faux-culture and at the same time riding a high-horse of an ill-perceived arrogance that’s based on nothing”
It was refreshing to speak to someone whose spent time in numerous cities and away from the Melbourne way of life.
As for me, after spending a number of years working and living abroad it is always intriguing to see how friends are doing back home.
Of course, everyone is a special snowflake and unique in their own way. But to simplify things, here are a few categories I have been able to place them into.
A bunch of friends have fallen into this category. The head first into their career, constantly pushing themselves to new limits often at the expense of their health. However, part of me understands. You see, in a pretty boring city like Melbourne, there’s only a few ways to really keep yourself occupied, go hard at your hobbies, go hard with family, or go hard on your career. If you’re in Finance, and want to move up the chair, most people will have to sacrifice many long nights and weekends churning out work to impress others and get that edge to move up the corporate ladder.
Ultimately though, how much is too much?
The difference of making $150k a year and $200k a year on a day to day basis probably isn’t noticeable to most. Money comes and goes, but time doesn’t after all.
The for lifer
Now these are the ones that ride the Melbourne train so hard. Boasting about the coffee and brunches as if no other city in the world compares. I nod and agree since it people in this category are usually so far gone that there’s not much point disagreeing. However in my head I think..
”Hmm.. go spend 3-5 years abroad in other more global cities in the world on a decent income and then come back to Melbourne”
But.. at this stage, its probably not the time in their life where they can afford to do that anymore since their so tied down to Melbourne.
I mean there’s nothing wrong with this category, but the young parents made the decision to have their kids young. So most of their time is spent on raising their kids. Understandable, I respect it.
Some people, actually most people, they aren’t making solid income or working in a field where they need to long hours.
You know, the ones that weren’t exactly cut out for complex tasks. The ones that can just coast. Do a whatever job, that’s 9-5 and have a ton of spare time to watch TV and buy useless stuff. The ones that need to post the useless stuff they bought from Big W on their social media.
Yeah, those types. I was reading an article in the Newspaper last week where a woman mentioned what she is most looking forward to after lockdown ends, her response “Getting my Kmart fix!”
Does it get any more Melbourne than that?
There’s a lot of hoarders in Melbourne, and buying stuff gives them that dopamine hit and keeps them busy so it acts as both a time sink and a source of joy. Win-Win, right?